A Prayer for Medicare

  • tune: Hole in the Bucket

Patient:
There a pain in my stomach, dear doctor, dear doctor,
There’s a pain in my stomach and I’ve got a cough.
Can I get an appointment, if you’re not too busy
Attending conventions or out playing golf?

Doctor:
I wish I could help you, but you’ve got no money,
And I can’t afford treating patients like you.
There’s a hole in my pocket, my life style is slipping.
I used to have three cars—now I only have two.

Patient:
But if you won’t treat me I might get pneumonia,
Iliitis, bronchitis or something much worse.
And hospitals say they can’t take more patients.
They can’t find the money for one extra nurse.

Doctor:
Then phone up Bill Clinton, dear patient, dear patient,
Newt Gingrich and all of those nice GOPs.
You can’t expect doctors to care about patients.
We might lose our money and catch some disease.

Patient:
But what do we do if we cannot afford you?
What do we do if we start to feel ill?
Doctor: We could sell you our CD, we call it “Dear Doctor.”
It comes with advice and a free headache pill.